The skill of communicating effectively in business and life is vital in order to be successful.
Why is effective communication important?
Words are given life by the perception of others and often two people can have two differing understandings of someone's words and the meaning they wished to convey.
Communication at Work
In business, teams cannot be successful if they do not understand each other. They need to understand the expectations and the directions given to them.
As a teacher, I am on both ends of the spectrum as I need to help my students understand my communication, as well as listen to their communication.
As a staff member, I need to practice the rules of effective communication in order to work well with others.
And the truth is that it is easier to work with some than with others as we have different personalities that can co-operate seamlessly with some staff but not necessarily with other staff.
When I worked in a room with 2 or 3 other staff, with different levels of understanding of disabilities, it was very hard emotionally until we knew each other better and understood each other more.
We had to communicate on a daily basis to work effectively together. I had to provide clear instructions to follow with each child. These instructions were both verbal and written and on prominent display, so there would be no misunderstanding of expectations.
I had to provide opportunities to share ideas and observations throughout the week.
The school also spent massive amounts of money on Personal Development sessions, focussing on effective teamwork.
Understanding between teams drives results.
Understanding your customers' needs and wants drives results, if you address them with clear communication.
Communication between family and friends
This principle also is true of communication with others in your family and community also.
As a mother, you will need effective communication skills with your children while also maintaining a strong relationship as a wife.
It is only now that one of my daughters brought up a traumatic event, that had happened 30 years ago, and I sat and listened, as she had kept some of it bottled up for many years. Her perception is different to mine, but the important thing was to listen respectfully.
If you are having a difficult time communicating with your husband or family, then you can use some of the principles of effective communication to get the teamwork needed for a successful family relationship.
I found some people in the family difficult and chose to turn my back on them because of the stress they caused. I learnt to shut things (and people) out when they were stressful and that was my way of coping.
Although those people were, and are, still difficult people, I now feel I could have had better relationships with them had I employed some of the tips listed below. At the end of the day, everyone wants to be liked and understood and will appreciate efforts you make in this direction.
Principles of effective communication
- Be clear and concise
- Be objective- it helps you stay respectful
- Be consistent
- Address assumptions
- Listen first
- Find a time and place to talk regularly-this is important in life as well. A close friend goes to a marriage counsellor each month with her husband to talk. They don't want to divorce so they made the decision when they married that they will go regularly.
- Ask questions
- Be respectful-I have worked with leaders who have shut down communication as they wanted their own way on important issues that staff did not agree with, and even one junior leader who openly showed her dismay if anyone asked a question about a new directive discussed with higher-level leaders. She openly said she only wanted to tell us what to do and not answer any questions!
- Recognise and reinforce positive behaviour.
- If I am leading, I like to have an agenda so there is a clear purpose for a meeting. This agenda is open to all so that they can ask questions and stay on topic. No one appreciates time-wasters who ramble on.
- Pay attention to non-verbal body language.
The greatest challenge is that we deal with different personality types each day. Some we find easier to work with while others are a learning experience.
If you would like to explore the 4 main personality types that are found, the book Surrounded by Idiots by Thomas Erikson may interest you.
Thomas Erikson dedicated himself to understanding how people function and why we often struggle to connect with certain types of people.
The aim of the book is to help readers get past the mentality of assuming we are surrounded by idiots and instead become fluent in the language of behaviour.
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Summary of his book, written by Thomas Erikson.
#1: Communication happens on the listener’s terms. Information is rarely received as the sender conceived it. To communicate effectively, we must adapt our style to the listeners.
#2: The four types of behaviour. The DISA model suggests there are four core types of behaviour, denoted by four colours (Red, Yellow, Green and Blue).
#3: Adapting and giving feedback to different behaviour types. Reds want direct, respectful communication and space to lead. Yellows want friendly communication and space to innovate. Greens want slow change, recognition and space to recharge. Blues want accurate detail and a focus on facts.
#4: Complementary and challenging combinations. The most challenging combinations are the behavioural opposites (Blue & Yellow and Red & Green).
#5: Stress factors and response of behaviour types. Each behaviour type has different stress triggers and handles stress differently.
You can have a look at Surrounded By Idiots by clicking on the image.
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